Dog Farts + Homework= Nightmare

Warning: I am incredibly unladylike. I just wanted to get that out there before I continue this random entry. Okay so last night I had some homework out to grade for my students. I had the TV on low and was pretending to be productive when a horrible, blood curdling scent penetrated my nostrils. *GAG!* At first I was like crap, I totally just ripped ass and couldn't tell. Then I checked my pits (wanted to make sure that I was not unsure), and then I checked my feet (dancer's feet are icky). The smell lingered and I realized that the smell did not originate from any of my holes or other body parts for that matter. Then I remembered that I was not alone. Curled and snoring on the floor were my two little angels (puppies). I stared at them wondering if it could be them, and sure enough I heard a squeeling noise as Titan's (boy dog) butthole opened and released another death determining fart. I about died, literally. I started fanning it hoping that would help. But no, the smell hovered over me like a cloud of horror. Ugh. Needless to say I had to exit the room and leave the papers there. I also ended up using my dogs' farts as an excuse not to grade anything at all. Yes, I know that I am pathetic. Long story short, I have a new fear...DOG FARTS. *Vomit in my mouth* Someone save me please!